QUOTE: My son, observe the postage stamp! Its usefulness depends upon its ability to stick to one thing until it gets there. Henry Wheeler Shaw, humorist

DON'T DO THAT AGAIN Robert Wise Your Churning Place

Before becoming a Screen Star, young Burt Lancaster was a circus performer - a job he was fortunate to land, considering his less than flawless audition. He was asked to perform on the parallel bars, so he leaped on the bars and began his routine. Because he was nervous, his timing was off, and he spun over the bar, falling flat on his face some 10 feet below. He was so humiliated that he immediately leaped back on the bar. As he spun again in the same point, he flipped off and smashed to the ground once more!

Burt's tights were torn, he was cut and bleeding, and he was fiercely upset. He leaped back again, but the 3 rd time was even worse, for this time he fell on his back. The agent came over, picked him up, and said "Son, if you won't do that again, you've got the job!"

CARRYING THE CROSS Charles Swindoll The Tale of the Tardy Oxcart

One Chicago youth minister was concerned that his youth might become distracted on their upcoming mission trip to Florida's balmy beaches. So, he fashioned a cross from 2 pieces of lumber. Just before they climbed on the bus, he shoed it to the group.

"I want all of you to remember the whole purpose of our going is to glorify the name of Christ, to lift up the Cross - the message of the cross, the emphasis of the Cross, the Christ of the Cross," he announced. "So, we're going to take this cross wherever we go."

The teenagers looked at one another, a little unsure of his plan. But they agreed to do it and dragged the cross on the bus. It banged back and forth in the aisle all the way to Florida. It wnet with them into restaurants. It stayed overnight where they stayed overnight. It stood in the sand while the ministered on the beach.

At first, lugging the cross around embarrassed the kids. But later, it became a point of identification. That cross was a constant, silent reminder of who they were and why they had come. They eventually regarded carrying it as an honor and privilege.

The night before they went home, the youth leader handed out two nails to each of the kids. He told them that if they wanted to commit themselves to what the cross stood for, they could hammer one nail into it, and keep the other with them. One by one, the teens drove their nail into the cross.

About 15 years later, one fellow - now a stockbroker - called the youth leader. He told him that he still keeps the nail with him in his desk drawer. Whenever he loses his sense of focus, he looks at the nail and remembers the cross on the that beach in Florida. It reminds him of what is at the core of his life - his commitment to Jesus Christ.

HE BUILT HIS DRILL PRESS Bunny Murphree Reminisce 10/02

Dad had just returned from WWII and tools were scarce and expensive. He needed a drill press and couldn't afford one, so he built his own from an old washing machine motor, a Model A Ford transmission, a car jack, motorcycle kick-starter and a burned out drill chuck. He used it for more than 50 years and... it still works.

NO ONE CAN BE RIGHT ALL THE TIME Dwight D. Eisenhower

"No man can always be right. So the struggle is to do one's best, to keep the brain and conscience clear, never to be swayed by unworthy motives or inconsequential reasons, but to strive to unearth the basic factors involved, then do one's duty."

BILLY SUNDAY AND BACKSLIDING

When Billy Sunday ( he was a professional baseball player who became an evangelist) was converted, a saintly man told him ... he said, "Billy, if you never want to backslide, you do three things every day. You read the Bible and let God speak to you through His Word fifteen minutes every day. You talk to Him in prayer fifteen minutes every day. And you spend fifteen minutes every day telling somebody about Jesus Christ." He said, "Billy, you’ll never have backslider written after your name."
Billy Sunday said, "You know, I’ve been sliding into a lot of bases. I’ve been sliding into a lot of bases a long time. I don’t plan to slide out of any."

I'LL OPEN MY DOOR TO ANY WHO NEED

The eighty-four year old Casper Ten Boom marched with other prisoners to the Gestapo headquarters, where he joined a long line of prisoners to have his name, address, and occupation taken. The chief interrogator, who saw the weak, harmless old man, had pity at him, queried his officers, “That old man! Did he have to be arrested?”

Before the officer had time to reply, the chief interrogator shouted at Father Ten Boom, “You, old man! I’d like to send you home, old fellow. I’ll take your word that you won’t cause any trouble.”

But Father Ten Boom replied weakly, but firmly and calmly, “If I go home today, tomorrow I will open my door again to any man in need who knocks.”

Casper Ten Boom died ten days later in a hospital corridor and was buried in a pauper’s grave, with no one bothering to inform the family.

FREE TO DIE

Marshall Shelley, editor of Leadership magazine tells of a conversation with a government official of the country of Jordan in the Middle East. He asked the government minister if the people of his nation would ever be free to change their religion.
"People are free to convert," the diplomat said.
"But it’s illegal for a Muslim to become a Christian," one of the journalists traveling with Shelley objected.
"People are free to convert, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t consequences," he said, evenly. "If you want to convert to a new faith, and it’s that important to you, shouldn’t you be willing to suffer and even to die for that faith?"
Shelley comments, "The logic was breathtaking. I’d just never heard anyone put it quite so directly. Freedom - to die."

I WANT TO BURN UP --George Bernard Shaw

I want to be thoroughly used up when I die, for the harder I work, the more I live. I rejoice in life for its own sake. Life is no "brief candle" to me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got hold of for the moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations

QUOTE: Let him that would move the world first move himself. Socrates

NEVER STAYED THROWED

The story is told that Andrew Jackson's boyhood friends just couldn't understand how he became a famous general and the President of the United States. They knew of other men who had greater talent but who never succeeded.

One of Jackson's friends said, "Why, Jim Brown, who lived right down the pike from Jackson, was not only smarter but he could throw Andy 3 times out of four in a wrestling match. But look where Andy is now."

Another friend responded, "How did there happen to be a fourth time? Didn't they usually say 'three times and out?'"

"Sure, they were supposed to, but not Andy. He would never admit he was beat - he would never stay 'throwed.' Jim Brown would get tired, and on the fourth try, Andrew Jackson would throw him and be the winner."

Picking up on that idea, someone has said, "The thing that counts is not how many times you are 'throwed,' but whether you are willing to stay 'throwed.'"

PASSION--The Sacred Romance, p. 3 Curtis & Eldredge
"The life of the heart is a place of great mystery.  Yet we have many expressions to help us express this flame of the human soul.  We describe a person without compassion as "heartless," and we urge him or her to "have a heart."  Our deepest hurts we call "heartaches."  Jilted lovers are "brokenhearted." 
Courageous soldiers are "brave hearted."  The truly evil are "black-hearted" and saints have
"hearts of gold."  If we need to speak at the most intimate level, we ask for a "heart-to-heart"
talk.  "Lighthearted" is how we feel on vacation.  And when we love someone as truly as we
may, we love "with all our heart."  But when we lose our passion for life, when a deadness sets
in which we cannot seem to shake, we confess, "My heart's just not in it."
  In the end, it doesn't matter how well we have performed or what we have accomplished-a
life without heart is not worth living." 

QUOTE: "You'll miss 100% of all the shots you don't take."---Wayne Gretsky

DR SEUSS' WISDOM ON MAKING A DECISION --Dr. Seuss
Did I ever tell you about the young Zoad?
Who came to a sign at the fork of the road?
He looked one way and the other way too
The Zoad had to make up his mind what to do -
Well, the Zoad scratched his head,
And his chin, and his pants. -
And he said to himself, "I'll be taking a chance.
If I go to Place One, that place may be hot
So how will I know if I like it or not.
On the other hand, though, I'll feel such a fool
If I go to Place Two and find it's too cool
In that case I may catch a chill and turn blue.
So Place One may be best and not Place Two.
Play safe," cried the Zoad,
"I'll play safe, I'm no dunce.
I'll simply start off to both places at once."
And that's how the Zoad who would not take a chance
Went no place at all with a split in his pants.

THE ALAMO Contributed by:  Mike Jeffress
American history, the Battle of the Alamo stands as a prime example of the kind of decisiveness Jesus calls for. In 1836 a band of fewer than 200 men defended the little mission in San Antonio, against General Santa Anna's 6,000 Mexican troops. For two weeks they held the Alamo against impossible odds. Then, on March 5, the night before what would surely be the final assault, William Barret Travis, the commander of the Texans, called a meeting of his men. Telling them he knew the enemy would break through the walls on the morrow, he drew his sword and cut a line in the sand. He invited those who wanted to stay and defend to the death to cross the line. Jim Bowie, who was sick on a pallet, asked to be carried across the line. And so today Jesus has drawn a line in the sand and he asks you to cross it. Will you stand united with him?   

QUOTE: No man is worth his salt who is not ready at all times to risk his body... to risk his well being... to risk his life... in a great cause. - T. Roosevelt

I WANT TO LIVE AT HOME!

After the christening of his baby brother in church, a little boy  sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy replied,

"That priest said he wanted us  brought up in a Christian home, but I want to stay with you and Mom!"

SOLD INTO SLAVERY FOR CHRIST

Some 250 years ago, two young Moravian men heard of an island in the West Indies which was virtually owned by one plantation master. He was a violent man who treated his slaves with complete contempt. He would not allow them to know anything of Christianity; no minister was permitted to come and form a church among them. So these two young Moravian men, gripped with a burden for a group of people who might never hear about the love of Jesus, sold themselves into slavery to that plantation master. The money they received for their own lives they used to pay for their passage to get to the island. They gave up their lives to go and live among that community of slaves and bring them the gospel.

Their families came to the docks to farewell them, knowing it was highly doubtful they would ever see them again. As the ship pulled out of the harbour, with mothers crying on the shore, the last words ever heard from them was when one of the young men cried out from the ship’s deck: “May the Lamb that was slain receive the reward of His suffering.” That became the catch-cry of the small Moravian community, who sent out 2158 recorded missionaries all over the world. Jesus had died for people who would never hear the gospel unless someone went to tell them.

COURAGEOUS COMMITMENT
Three military recruiters showed up to address high school seniors. Each recruiter - representing the Army, Navy, and Marine Corps - was to have fifteen minutes. The Army and Navy recruiters got carried away, so when it came time for the Marine to speak, he had just two minutes. He walked up and stood utterly silent for a full sixty seconds, half of his time. Then he said this: "I doubt whether there are two or three of you in this room who could even cut it in the Marine Corps. But I want to see those two or three immediately in the dining hall when we are dismissed." He turned smartly and sat down. When he arrived in the dining hall, those students interested in the Marines were a mob. The recruiter knew that commitment comes from appealing to the heroic dimension in every heart.

ALL I CAN OFFER YOU

During the siege of Rome in 1849, Garibaldi, the great Italian patriot, made this famous proclamation: "Soldiers, all our efforts against superior forces have been unavailing. I have nothing to offer you but hunger & thirst, hardship & death. But I call on all who love their country to join with me."

I WANT THE GUY WHO HITS

Coach Shug Jordan at Auburn University asked his former Linebacker Mike Kollin if he would help his alma mater do some recruiting.
Mike said, "Sure, coach. What kind of player are you looking for?" The coach said, "Well Mike, you know there's that fellow, you knock him down, he just stays down?" Mike said, "We don't want him, do we, coach?"
"No, that's right. Then there's that fellow, you knock him down and he gets up, you knock him down again and he stays down." Mike said, "We don't want him either do we coach?"
Coach said, "No, but Mike, there's a fellow, you knock him down, he gets up. Knock him down, he gets up. Knock him down, he gets up. Knock him down, he gets up."
Mike said, "That's the guy we want isn't it, coach?" The coach answered, "No, Mike, we don't want him either. I want you to find the guy who's knocking everybody down. That's the guy we want."

. I DIDN’T WANT ANYBODY TO KNOW

Charlie Moore moved into a new community and to make friends he joined the local softball league. During one game, Charlie got up to bat and missed the ball by a mile. The crowd groaned, but one voice could be heard over the den of people: “You can do it, Mr. Moore!”

The second pitch came and again the scene was repeated.

The third pitch – same result.

In the car on the way home, his son admitted that it was his voice that his dad heard yelling, “You can do it, Mr. Moore.”

His dad was gratified by the support, but he asked: “But, why did you call Mr. Moore?”

“Because,” the boy replied, “I didn’t want anyone to know I was related to you.”

ISN'T IT FUNNY........ (part 2)

How we set our clocks to arise at 4:00a.m. or 5:00a.m. to be at the job by 8:00a.m., yet when Sunday comes, we can't get to church by 11:00a.m. to praise the one who gave us the jobs!

Funny how we call God our Father and Jesus our brother, but find it hard to introduce them to our family.

Funny how small our sins seem, but how big "their" sins are.

Funny how we demand justice for others, but expect mercy from God.

Funny how much difficulty some have learning the gospel well enough to tell others, but how simple it is to understand and explain the latest gossip about someone else.

Funny how we can't think of anything to say when we pray, but don't have any difficulty thinking of things to talk about to a friend.

Funny how we are so quick to take directions from a total stranger when we are lost, but are hesitant to take God's direction for our lives.

Funny how so many church goers sing "Standing on the Promises" but all they do is sit on the premises.

Funny how people want God to answer their prayers, but refuse to listen to His counsel.

Funny how we sing about heaven, but live only for today.

Funny how people think they are going to Heaven but don't think there is a Hell.

Funny how it is okay to blame God for evil and suffering in the world, but it is not necessary to thank Him for what is good and pleasant.

Funny how when something goes wrong, we cry, "Lord, why me?" but when something goes right, we think, "Hey, it must be me!"

ELMO QUIT

A teenager had decided to quit high school, saying he was just fed up with it all. His father was trying to convince him to stay with it. “Son,” he said, “you just can’t quit. All the people who are remembered in history didn’t quit. Abe Lincoln didn’t quit. Thomas Edison didn’t quit. Douglas MacArthur didn’t quit. And then there was Elmo Cringle...”

“Who?” the son burst in. “Who is Elmo Cringle?”

“See,” the father replied, “you don’t remember him because he quit!”

THE GOOD QUIT BEING GOOD

Around 1870 New York City had one of the most hotly contested mayor's races in its history. The incumbent was Mayor John Tweed--Boss Tweed he was called. He was running for reelection. The Boss Tweed machine represented politics at its very worst. The entire administration was corrupt to the core. A number of dedicated people decided that they were fed up with this kind of politics and the good people of the city took on the Boss Tweed element. At first they seemed to make headway. But as the campaign drug on they began to feel the pressures of machine politics. Many of these good people began to drop out. When the election was held and the results counted, to many people's disappointment, they discovered that Boss Tweed had been reelected. The next day the New York Times ran an editorial and analyzed what had happened. It said: The good people quit being good before the bad people quit being bad"

I WANT THE PICTURE BACK

A college man walked into a photography studio with a framed picture of his girlfriend. He wanted the picture duplicated. This involved removing it from the frame. In doing this, the studio owner noticed the inscription on the back of the photograph: "My dearest Tom, I love you with all my heart. I love you more and more each day. I will love you forever and ever. I am yours for all eternity." It was signed "Diane," and it contained a P.S.: "If we ever break up, I want this picture back."

FOLLOWER, NOT A DISCIPLE?

William Barclay writes: It's possible to be a follower of Jesus without being a disciple; to be a camp-follower without being a soldier of the king; to be a hanger-on in some great work without pulling one's weight. Once someone was talking to a great scholar about a younger man. He said, "So and so tells me that he was one of your students." The teacher answered devastatingly, "He may have attended my lectures, but he was not one of my students." There is a world of difference between attending lectures and being a student. It is one of the supreme handicaps of the Church that in the Church there are so many distant followers of Jesus and so few real disciples.

QUOTE: We are judged by our actions, not our intentions. We may have a heart of gold, but then, so does a hard-boiled egg.

CROSS' COST

Clarence Jordan, author of the "Cotton Patch" New Testament translation and founder of the interracial Koinonia farm in Americus, Georgia, was getting a red-carpet tour of another minister's church. With pride the minister pointed to the rich, imported pews and luxurious decorations.

As they stepped outside, darkness was falling, and a spotlight shone on a huge cross atop the steeple.

"That cross alone cost us ten thousand dollars," the minister said with a satisfied smile.

"You got cheated," said Jordan. "Times were when Christians could get them for free."

AIN'T NO REAR IN THIS BATTLE Preaching Magazine, Jul-Aug, 1986, p 42

Historian Shelby Foote tells of an incident during the Civil War when a Union soldier was shot in the arm during the battle of Shiloh. His captain saw he was wounded and barked out an order, "Gimme your gun, Private, and get to the rear!"

The private handed over his rifle and ran toward the north, seeking safety. But after only going about two or three hundred yards, he came upon another skirmish. So he ran to the east, and found himself in another part of the battle. Then he ran west, but encountered more fighting there.

Finally, he ran back to the front lines shouting, "Gimme back my rifle,Cap'n .There ain't no rear to this battle no where!"

A new soldier on the battlefront asked his 1^st sergeant in a nervous voice: "Sarge, where is my foxhole?"
"Why, son," replied the old sergeant, "You're standing on it."
"I am?" asked the bewildered youth.

"Yeah," smiled the sarge, "all you have to do is throw the dirt out."

THE BEST FREE THROW SHOOTER - from sermon by Roddy Chestnut

Do you know who the world’s best basketball free throw shooter is? Michael Jordan? David Robinson? No. A 71 yr. old foot doctor named Tom Amberry! In Nov. 1993 he set world’s record with 2,750 in a row! Didn’t miss 2,751--had to close gym for the night. What’s his secret? Concentration! "The more I read about it and looked into it, the more I realized the only way you do it is practice. You have to perfect all parts of your technique; then it’s just focus and concentration. You have to put all other thoughts out of your mind." So he bounces the ball three times, focuses, shoots ... swish!

QUOTE: A man who wants to do something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." Stephen Dolley, Jr.

WHO WAS WORLD’S FIRST TURNCOAT? Why do Cowboys wear High Heels? Jeff Rovin

It was the Duke of Saxony who, in the middle 16^th century, owned land that was claimed by both Spain and France. The two nations fought over the land, and the duke had no idea who would be victorious, or whose armies would be where exactly when.

His solution? The canny duke had his tailor make a coat for him that had Spain’s color (blue) on one side, and France’s color (white), on the other. Whenever one or the other side’s armies came marching through his land, he would simply turn his coat accordingly and cheer the men on. Other noblemen did likewise, and the practice, along with the word, caught on.

Most of you heard about the pilot, Henry Dempsey who was flying his 15 passenger Beechcraft 99 turboprop from Lewiston Maine to Boston last week. At 4000 feet he heard a noise in the back of the plain where the rear stairs are. He turned the controls over to his co-pilot and walked back. The plain hit turbulence knocked him against the door and it fell open.

Dempsey was sucked part way out, fell face down on the steps and grabbed for something -- anything that might save his life. He caught a railing and held on.

The co-pilot thought he had fallen out and diverted the flight to a nearby airport. When he landed they found him with his face 12 inches off the runway and with his hands of tight around the rails that his fingers had to be pried open.

QUOTE: Let us have faith that right makes might, and in that faith, let us to do the end, dare to do our duty, as we understand it.

THE COMMUNIST JUGGARNAUT I Believe in the Church David Watson, Eerdmanns, '78

The Communist revolution of this century has demanded unhesitating obedience. An American student wrote a letter to his fiancé breaking off their engagement. "We communists have a high casualty rate. We are the ones who get shot at, hung, jailed, lynched, tarred and feathered, slandered, ridiculed, and fired from our jobs., and in every way made as uncomfortable as possible. A certain percentage of us gets killed or imprisoned; we live in virtual poverty. We turn back to the Party every penny we make above what is necessary to keep us alive. We communists don't have time or money for many movies or concerts or T-bone steaks or decent homes or new cars. We've been described as fanatics; we are fanatics. Our lives are dominated by one overshadowing factor: the Struggle for World Communism! Therefore I cannot carry on a friendship, a love affair, or even a conversation, without relating everything to this force which both guides and drives my life… I have already been in jail because of my ideas, and if necessary I am ready to go before a firing squad."

THE DIFFERENT CHURCH Simeon Stylites Halford Luccock in The Christian Century

…"if the habits of that company in the Upper Room had been like the habits of multitudes in our churches today… The meeting was called for the 1t day of the week, but so many things interfered that of the company of 120, only 40 could be present. Peter and his wife had bought a cottage on Lake Galilee and were away from the hot city over the weekend. Bartholomew had guests and of course could not come. Philip and his family had been up late the night before and overslept. Andrew had a business conference about a new fishing boat. James had to stay at home and cut the grass…"

OFF BALANCE ACTION IN FOOTBALL Bill Glass

I have noticed that about 75% of the tackles made in a game are made by players that are knocked down or at least off balance. But they are so determined that they make the tackle anyway. When I was a young player, I thought that when I got knocked down that this was a good time to rest. I got trampled so many times that I soon learned that the ground was the most dangerous place on the field. So when you get knocked down, get up and go again. Don’t stay there. You’ll get hurt and you’ll miss a great opportunity to be of help to your team. When we sin in thought or deed, we can receive immediate forgiveness if we confess it to God (I John 1:9). I have found that if I confess a sin in the thought stage, then it doesn’t have a chance to get to the overt stage. If Satan trips you into a temptation, don’t stay there – get up and get back into uniform.

The late Vince Lombardi, coach of the Green Bay Packers, reported that during the course of a game, approximately 150 plays are employed.

His studies and experience showed that the difference between winning and losing a game hinged on "an average of 2 plays, and a maximum of 5."

Having set out to become a missionary, a young man was approached by a friend who pointed out that the country he decided to go to was fraught with dangers. When his friend suggested that he might die in such a perilous situation, the young man bravely replied "I died when I decided to go."

QUOTE: The greatest use of a life is to spend it for something that will outlast life. – William James

QUOTE: I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody. ---- Bill Cosby

QUOTE: There are two kinds of people: those who say to God: Thy will be done, and those to whom God says: All right, then, have it your way. C.S. Lewis

BYE DADDY from Craig S. Kunishige, in Reader's Digest
During the Persian Gulf War, I was assigned to go to Saudi Arabia. As I was saying good-bye to my family, my three-year-old son, Christopher, was holding on to my leg and pleading with me not to leave. "No, Daddy, please don't go!" he kept repeating.
We were beginning to make a scene when my wife, desperate to calm him, said, "Let Daddy go and I'll take you to get a pizza."
Immediately, Christopher loosened his death grip, stepped back and in a calm voice said, "'Bye, Daddy."

GIVING IT ALL UP TO WIN 1 SUPER BOWL Scott Saltzman 1/3/2000

MINNEAPOLIS (AP) - … The Vikings drew a team-record (attendance)… Christ Doleman’s 1½ sacks gave him 151, making him the 4^th player to surpass 150 career sacks since the league began keeping track in 1982. "I’d give up all 150 just to win one Super Bowl," Doleman said.

By Arnie Stapleton AP Sports Writer

Updated at Mon. Jan. 3 10:14:37 2000 PT

Refer to Philippians 3:7-9

YEAR 2000 NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS Source: Excite.com
"Which of the following will top your list of New Year's resolutions?" Survey Says...
Lose weight - 23%
Stop smoking - 5%
Exercise more - 15%
Improve finances - 11%
Be a better person - 14%
Find a new job/Get a promotion - 5%
Learn something new - 6%
None of these - 16%

"I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law." -- David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes.
"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country." -- Washington, DC Mayor Marion Barry
"Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl." -- Bill Peterson, football coach

THAT’S THE GUY WHO STOLE MY BIKE
Muhammad Ali says that when he was a child his parents gave him a brand new bicycle. A few days later someone stole it. A policeman asked him what he was going to do if he caught the boy who stole it. Ali said that he didn't know.
So the policeman took him to the gym and began teaching him how to box. Ali said, "To this day I never found my bike, but every time I got in the ring, I'd look across at my opponent and say to myself, that's the guy who stole my bike!"

ISN’T IT FUNNY?

Funny how a $20 bill looks so big when you take it to church, but so small when you take it to the market..
Funny how long it takes to serve God for an hour, but how quickly a team plays 60 minutes of basketball..
Funny how long a couple of hours spent at church are, but how short they are when watching a movie..
Funny how we can't think of anything to say when we pray, but don't have difficulty thinking of things to talk about to a friend..
Funny how we get thrilled when a baseball game goes into extra innings, but we complain when a sermon is longer than the regular time..
Funny how hard it is to read a chapter in the bible, but how easy it is to read 100 pages of a best selling novel..
Funny how people want to get a front seat at any game or concert, but scramble to get a back seat at church services..
Funny how we need 2 or 3 weeks advance notice to fit a church
event into our schedule, but can adjust our schedule for other events at the last moment..
Funny how hard it is for people learn a simple gospel message well enough to tell others, but how simple it is for the same people to understand and repeat gossip..
Funny how we believe what the newspaper says,
but question what the Bible says..
Funny how everyone wants to go to heaven provided they do not have to believe, or to think, or to say, or to do anything..
Funny how you can send a thousand 'jokes' through e-mail and they spread like wildfire,
but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing..
FUNNY, ISN'T IT? Are you laughing? Are you thinking?

LET ME HEAR YOU PLAY

A young American engineer was sent to Ireland for a year. When he left, his fiancé gave him a harmonica. She said, "I want you to learn to play this to keep your mind off those Irish girls."
He wrote and told her he was practicing the harmonica every night. After a year
she met him at the airport, he grabbed her to kiss her and she pushed back and said, "Wait before you kiss me, I want to hear you play the harmonica."

Died: Eddie Stankey, 83, pugnacious, pennant-winning 2^nd baseman; in Fairhope, Ala. Nicknamed "the Brat" Stanky battled his way through 11 seasons for National League teams; including the champion Brooklyn Dodgers, Boston Braves and New York Giants. "He can’t run, he can’t hit and he can’t throw," said Dodgers general manager Branch Rickey. "But if there’s a way to beat the other team, he’ll find it."

DON’T GET IN HIS WAY Tom Fitzgerald in San Francisco Chronicle R.Digest 9/98

Sumo wrestler Musashimaru, a 463-pounder who escorted the U.S. Olympic delegation in the opening ceremony in Nagano, Japan, was asked what he eats. He replied: "Anything in the way."

QUOTE: Lou Holtz: "The kamikaze pilot who flew 50 missions was involved – but never committed."

"The nose of the Bulldog is slanted backwards so he can continue to breathe without letting go." Winston Churchill

When it absolutely, positively, has to be destroyed overnight! US Marines.

If you die first, we're splitting up your gear.

SILENT CAL R.Digest 5/96 p. 40 - Jack Sundine

In the Spring of 1924, I was a 4 year old kid, standing in a line with my father inside the White House, waiting to meet President Calvin Coolidge. As we neared him, I notice that he said something to each visitor as they shook hands.

Soon, the thrilling moment arrived. I put my small hand in his. Then he said words I'll always remember: "Move along."

Paul had a home run purpose. He announced it this way "FOR ME TO LIVE IS CHRIST." That was his purpose.

That kind of commitment is required to succeed in reaching life goals and is illustrated by the story of a great baseball pitcher. When Bob Feller was 9 years old, his teacher asked him to write an essay about an oak tree. Here are the ideas that he put in his theme:
An oak tree can be cut down and sawed into boards. You can make baseball bats out of them. You can also make home plates out of the boards. You can make bleachers out of the boards so people can watch baseball games.

At the age of nine years, he was saying - For me to live is baseball.

Doug Parsons writes, 'I had a professor who used to say in class 'Make a list of all the things for which you are willing to be shot at five o'clock tomorrow morning.' Generally, it will be a very short list; but when you have completed it, you will find in that list the things for which you ought to live - things that will produce the ultimate satisfaction in life."

What things would you put on your list that you would be willing to die for? Think carefully. Christ and His church? Your family? Maybe your country or a really close friend? That is probably about as far as most would go. Would you die for your job? No, a job is not that important. Would you die for a hobby or a television set? You say, 'Of course not."

Yet I know men who are sacrificing their families and their own hopes of eternal life for a hobby. I know both men and women who are even now in danger of losing their families eternally because they are placing a job ahead of everything else. And I know people who are trading a home in heaven for a TV set right now.

In the famous Charles Dickens classic, 'A Christmas Carol," Ebenezer Scrooge is shown the happy home, children, and a loving wife he gave up in order to be successful in business. In the process he had become a lonely, bitter old man, but, as those familiar with the story know, he realized his mistake before it was everlastingly too late and became a better man.

Life is a series of choices - transactions - but we do not always realize what we are selling to purchase our desire until it is too late. Consider carefully what things are most important to you, and especially what will be the most important to you a thousand years from now. Then read Matthew 6:33 and start putting it into practice. I have seen people grow old and die, but not one who had followed his plan has ever expressed regret for the choices made.

Many stories are told of the good Paul Gerhardt whose hymns are still sung in Germany. That great John Wesley translated some of them for us to sing.

Gerhardt's family was very poor. He was the shepherd boy who cared for the small flock of sheep and goats on the edge of the forest. One day a hunter came out from among the trees and asked the lad how far it was to the nearest village.

"Six miles, sire," he replied, "but the road is only a sheep track and can easily be missed."

"I've lost my way and I am very tired," returned the hunter. "Leave your sheep and show me the way. I will pay you well."

"No, Sire" said Gerhardt. "I cannot do that for they would stray into the forest and be stolen or eaten by the wolves."

"Never mind; your master would never miss one or two, and I would pay you more than the price of one or two sheep."

"But, sire, my master trusts me with these sheep, and I have promised not to leave them."

"Well," said the hunter, "Let me take care of the sheep while you fetch me food from the village and a guide."

"The sheep do not know your voice and would not obey you, sir."

"Can you not trust me? Do I not look like an honest man?" asked the hunter with a frown.

"Sir," said the boy slowly, "You tried to make me false to my trust, and break my word to my master. How do I know that you will keep your word to me?"

The hunter could not help laughing.

"I see you are an honest lad, and I will not forget you," said the hunter. "Which is the path? I must find my way for myself."

But Gerhardt would not let the man depart hungry, so he gave him the humble contents of his scrip. Just at the moment several men came hurrying through the forest uttering shouts of delight as they caught sight of the two of them. Gerhardt had been talking to the

Grand Duke and these were his attendants who had been much alarmed at his disappearance.

This was the beginning of Gerhardt's future charter of honor and success. Pleased with the lad's honesty, the Duke had him well educated and thus gave him a good state in life.

Yes, God wants us to be honest in His sight, and to our fellowman. You will find throughout your life that it pays to be honest.

The battle of Midway was the turning point for the U.S. in it's war with Japan. It was the first chance to surprise the Japanese fleet and catch their carriers. The Americans committed everything they had to the fight. Every carrier (four of them) was committed. If we lost these ships there would be nothing left to protect Hawaii and eventually the west coast. Both fleets sent out their search planes. The Americans were the first to spot the enemy. A lone recon plane saw the wake of a ship zigzagging through the ocean below through a break in the clouds. The U.S. attacked. Wave after wave. Of the first 42 torpedo planes, 35 were lost. Of the 82 pilots; 69 were killed. Three irreplaceable squadron leaders were killed. Of all the torpedoes dropped, not one hit a Japanese ship. Yet the U.S. won. How? Because ONE man (Lt. Comm. Charles "Wade" McLuskey) made a tough decision. With 1/2 of his fuel gone he had to choose whether to continue to search for the enemy or go home. He crossed the point of no return after having taken a wrong course and losing contact with the rest of its mother ship aircraft. At 10:25 of June 4th, 1942 his fighter group of 37 Dauntless dive bombers from the U.S.S. carrier Enterprise sighted the Japanese fleet from 14,500 feet and in a period of 5 minutes, mangled the Japanese fleet below them. Three Japanese carriers were crippled and sank, and a fourth, which evaded the attack was sunk 7 hours later. With the decimation of Japan's First Air Fleet under Admiral Nagumo, Japan's position of power in the Pacific was reversed and its ultimate defeat was ensured.

Jebel Taruk and the conquest of Spain. The Umayyads were also talented military leaders, and under their rule Islam's second great wave of conquests took place during the early part of the, Eighth century. They carried Muslim arms into Central Asia as far as the Indus valley in India, and west, through North Africa and Spain, to the Atlantic. Their bold manner of conquest is suggested by the rallying words of a Muslim leader (Jebel Taruk, from whose name we get the name Gibraltar) who, upon landing his troops at Gibraltar in 711, ordered all the boats burned, shouting to his men: "The sea is behind you, and the enemy is in front of you. By God, there is no escape for you save in valor and determination."

DON'T QUIT Copied "The Crossroads"

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will, When the road you're trudging seems all uphill, When the funds are low, and the debts are high, and you want to smile, but you have to sigh. When care is pressing you down a bit, Rest if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns, as everyone of us sometimes learns. And many a failure turns about when he might have won had he stuck it out. Don't give up though the pace seems slow. You may succeed with another blow.

Success is failure turned inside out. The silver tint of the clouds of doubt, and you never can tell how close you are, It may be near when it seems so far. So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit, It's when things seem worse that you must not quit.

A story is told about the great halfback, George Cafego, during the early days of pro football. Playing for the old Brooklyn Dodgers football team against the New York Giants one day, Cafego brought the ball upfield practically by himself. Just before the half ended, he broke away over left tackle.

First one man hit him, then another. But Cafego kept going. Finally, about five Giants ganged up on him, and still he plowed goalward. At last he started down - just as the timer's gun exploded.

"My gosh!" a spectator shouted. "They had to shoot him to stop him!"

A Mormon acquaintance once pushed Mark Twain into an argument on the issue of polygamy. After long and tedious exposition justifying the practice, the Mormon demanded that Twain cite any passage of Scripture expressly forbidding polygamy.

"Nothing easier, Twain replied. "No man can serve two masters."

Most of us would laugh at a funny story such as this and yet the words of Jesus are quite true. No man can serve two masters. Today so many things are demanding first place in our lives. Our bosses think that the job should have first place. If we are in school our teachers think each subject should have first place. If in athletics, the coach wants the sport to have first place. In the home, the family seeks to have first place. Many believe their own personal desires should have first place. No wonder so many people are confused. Who has the right to have first place in your life?

Only God has that right. When we give Him the drivers seat of our lives then all the other areas of life fall into their proper place. (Col. 1:15-18)

Lou Gehrig, one of the best loved super baseball players in the history of the game, play a record of 2,130 consecutive games. Think of it..2,130 games without missing a single one! As team captain, he led the Yankees to three world series pennants. Lou played in spite of fevers & cold. And there were times during which he was so bent over with lumbago that he could not straighten up at the plate. One year he fractured a toe & played on. Knocked unconscious & suffering from a concussion, he was at his position the next day & collected four hits. When late in his career his hands were x-rayed, doctors found 17 fractures that had healed by themselves. He had broken every finger on both hands... some of them twice. But through it all, he never complained, never told anyone...AND HE NEVER MISSED A GAME!!

DOES YOUR SISTER PLAY BALL? R.Digest 4/94

During a long and losing baseball game, the restless 4-year-old players questioned Ritchie, their assistant coach, about his attractive sister. Annoyed at the idle chatter, the head coach hollered, "When you're in the dugout, talk BASEBALL!"

After a silent moment, a voice called out, "So, Ritchie, does your sister play baseball?"

MUSTANG FEVER 2ND Bathroom Reader

The introduction of the Mustang on April 17, 1964 was a big event. Here are 5 of the bizarre things that happened that day.

1. A Mustang was the pace car for a stock car race in Huntsville, Alabama. When it drove onto the track, thousands of people scaled the retaining wall to get a better look at it. The race was delayed for over an hour.

2. A cement truck crashed through the plate-glass window of a Seattle Ford dealer when the driver lost control of his vehicle. The reason: He was staring at the new Mustangs on display there. They looked "like some of them expensive Italian racers," he explained.

3. A Chicago Ford dealer was forced to lock the doors of his show-room models because too many people were trying to get into them at the same time.

4. A Texas dealer put a new Mustang on a lift to show a prospective customer the underside of the vehicle. By the time his demonstration was over, the showroom was filled with people, and he had to leave the Mustang up in the air for the rest of the day.

5. A New Jersey Ford dealer had only one Mustang and 15 eager buyers, so he auctioned it off. The winner of the auction insisted on sleeping in the car to be sure the dealer didn't sell it to someone else before his check cleared.

There was a very cautious man

Who never laughed or played

He never risked, he never tried

He never sang or prayed

And when he one day passed away

His insurance was denied

For since he never really lived

They claimed he never died.

PAINE ON THE GLORY OF CONFLICT -- Thomas Paine, The Crisis -- December 1776

These are the times that try men's souls: The summer soldier and the sunshine patriot will, in this crisis, shrink from the service of his country; but he that stands it now, deserves the love and thanks of man and woman. Tyranny, like hell, is not easily conquered; yet we have this consolation with us, that the harder the conflict the more glorious the triumph.

Wilbur Reese writes with biting sarcasm:

I would like to buy $3 worth of God, please

Not enough to explode my soul or disturb my sleep, but just enough

to equal a cup of warm milk or a snooze in the sunshine.

I don't want enough of him to make me love a black man or pick

beets with a migrant.

I want ecstasy, not transformation.

I want the warmth of the womb not a new birth.

I want about a pound of the eternal in a paper sack.

I'd like to buy $3 worth of God, please.

How much of God do you want?

INTENSE DEVOTION MAKES ALL ELSE FADE "Masterpiece," September 1989

John MacArthur shares this illustration on what it means to love like a disciple:

I heard about a man sitting before a fireplace lost in thought. The drapes had been closed and the room was dark except for the flickering light of the dying fire. Finally the flames themselves disappeared, leaving nothing but a heap of gray ashes topped with glowing embers. One burning coal stood out brilliantly from all the rest because it was white hot. The man's gaze was transfixed upon it. Suddenly that brilliant white-hot coal turned completely black. The man was startled. What had caused the instant change? As he looked around, he noticed that the drapes had parted slightly and a shaft of brilliant sunlight had shot into the study and landed directly on the burning coal. The greater light had made the lesser light look black by comparison.

That is what Christ demands of us. Our love and devotion for Him must be so complete that the deepest love we have for our dearest loved one fades in comparison. Do you love the Lord Jesus like that? If you don't -- or aren't willing to -- you cannot be His disciple.

"Will you please tell me in a few words," said a Christian woman to a minister, "what you think 'consecration' means?"

Holding out a blank sheet of paper, the minister replied, "It is to sign your name at the bottom of this blank sheet and let God fill it in as He wills."

Sixty tons of firewood and 140 gallons of gasoline were needed to get the great bonfire going. Nothing less would reduce to ashes the 2400 elephant tusks - twelve tons of ivory in all - that Kenyan wildlife officials had confiscated from poachers in the past four years.

President Daniel arap Moi ignited the 20 foot tower of ivory, which had been erected in a clearing overlooking the Athi Plains in Nairobi's game park. The pyre was a memorial to the hundreds of thousands of elephants slaughtered in Africa by poachers over the past ten years, and a symbol of Kenya's avowed resolve to end poaching and the global ivory trade that threatens the elephant with extinction. In just the past decade the population of Kenya's herd has plummeted from 65000 to 17000. Had Kenya sold the store of tusks, many hacked from the skulls of baby elephants, it could have earned $3 million. But, said Moi, "obviously, Kenya cannot appeal to the world to stop buying ivory if at the same time we are selling the very same commodity."

Paul gave this admonition in Gal. 6:9, "And let us not be weary in well-doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not."

A scientist once conducted an interesting experiment in his laboratory. From the ceiling he suspended an iron ball weighing a ton, attaching it to a cable strong enough to sustain its weight. Beside the huge iron ball, he hung a small sphere made of cork, attached to a thread fastened to the ceiling. An electrical mechanism kept the little cork ball swinging slowly, pendulum-like, against the iron weight.

At length, after days of unceasing swinging back and forth on the part of the cork, the iron ball weighing a ton began to swing very gently to and fro in harmony with the little cork ball. Gradually its motion increased until it was prescribing a wide arc, all because a tiny cork ball had persistently kept knocking against its massive side, day in and day out.

STANDING FIRM OR STRADDING FENCE? POEM Inez Thorson

The man who cannot settle in his mind

where he should stand, but merely stays astride

the fence, is certain in the end to prove

himself of little worth to either side.

But he alone will be of value who,

though sometimes pressure may be brought to bear,

knows in his heart where he should stand and then

despite the consequences, stands firmly there.

QUOTE: He who doesn't stand for something, will fall for anything.

50 SOLDIERS TIP THE BALANCE Bob Idell, Palestine OH Oct 89

During the Civil War there was a small unimportant battle almost lost in history. 1000 Union soldiers received orders to pack light and march to another camp. By coincidence, a 1000 Confederates received similar orders that day. The two units met at a place between the camps. There was no important town or bridge to capture or defend, but a bitter struggle followed.

Since the men were traveling light, they were soon out of ammunition and began to fight hand to hand. It was a hot summer afternoon. After 3 hours of fierce fighting, the men were dropping from exhaustion.

Suddenly, fifty fresh Union soldiers arrived on the scene. Though none of these men actually engaged in the conflict, their presence encouraged their comrades and renewed their strength. The battle was won in minutes.

WHAT? LET HIM REST? R.Digest 12/80 p.53

When Joe Louis was in his prime he fought "Two-Ton" Tony Galento, who loved to fight but hated to train. Galento threw his Sunday punch and sent Louis sprawling. The champ, more surprised than hurt, jumped to his feet without waiting for the count. At the end of the round he was scolded by his second: "You know you're supposed to take the full count when you go down. Why didn't you stay down for nine?"

"And give him a chance to rest?" snarled Louis.

HOW LONG DO I HAVE? R.Digest 2/82 p.11

As raw recruits were preparing for their first jump from a C130 aircraft at 1200 ft., the sergeant explained what to do if the main parachute didn't open: "Snap back immediately into a tight body position," he said. "Then pull the rip cord of your reserve chute, and it will open, bringing you safely to the ground."

A private stirred nervously and slowly raised his hand, "Sergeant, if my main parachute doesn't open, how long do I have to pull my reserve?"

The sergeant looked directly into the young private's eyes and replied earnestly, "The rest of your life, soldier. The rest of your life."

WOULD YOU DO IT WHEN I'M DEAD? R.Digest 11/75 p. 205

Advertising tycoon Albert D. Lasker requested one of his top executives to move from California to the New York office. The man refused, so Lasker took a new tack. "I have just made my will," he told the man. "I have designated you to succeed me as head of the business. This means that you will have to leave California when the time comes. Do you agree?"

"Yes."

"You will do this for me?"

"Yes."

"You will do this for me when I am dead?"

"Yes," repeated the executive.

"Then, why," demanded Lasker, "won't you do it for me while I'm alive?"

The executive capitulated.

FASTER WORK AFTER "BAPTISM" R.Digest 5/75 p. 53

While visiting my uncle's farm, I watched him and his hired hand put up a fence. Suddenly, my uncle dropped a post into a large puddle, splattering himself and his helper with muddy water. Although my uncle expressed dismay, the act appeared to me deliberate, and I asked him about it later.

"Yes," he replied, "I kinda hated to do that. But Henry was wearing a brand new pair of overalls, and he was thinking more about keeping them clean than about getting the fence put up. Did you notice how much faster the work went after the baptism?"

% OF THOSE WHO VOLUNTEER From a survey cited by the U.C Chamber of Commerce

Someone asked them personally 44%

A friend or family member was already involved 29%

Were already participating in group or organization 25%

Sought the activity on their own 25%

Responded to an ad or media request 6%

The proprietor of a dry-cleaning and dyeing business hung this quaint sign in his window: "We dye to live, we live to dye; the more we dye, the more we live; and the more we live, the more we dye." For the child of God, it is also true that the more he dies, the more he lives!

None of us are truly free to be Christ's disciples until we break with everything that hinders our commitment to the Lord. Misplaced affections must be abandoned, for they bind us to that which is passing away.

History provides an incident illustrating this important principle. When Julius Caesar landed on the shores of Britain with his Roman legions, he took a bold and decisive step to ensure the success of his military venture. Ordering his men to halt on the edge of the Cliffs of Dover, he commanded them to look down at the water below. To their amazement, they saw every ship in which they had crossed the channel engulfed in flames. Caesar had deliberately cut off any possibility of retreat! Now that his soldiers were unable to return to the continent, there was nothing left for them to do but to advance and conquer! And that is exactly what they did.

A similar psychology for discipleship is suggested by Christ in the words of our text. He declared that we as His followers must break all ties that weaken our commitment to Him. Jesus didn't mean we should literally hate our loved ones or renounce all material possessions. But He was using "coined expressions" -- well known by the Jewish people of His day -- to make it crystal-clear that no person or thing should be considered worthy competition for the Son of God! (Matthew 10:37-38)